I WON THIS INSURRECTION, BY A LOT!

Discussing the event that feels like it happened both a year ago and just last week

If you had asked me two years ago where I expected myself to be right now, I don’t think I would have said, “Ringing in the third year of a global pandemic by talking about the one-year anniversary of a violent insurrection at the Capitol.” But hey, who among us really knows how life is going to go.

With the anniversary of the January 6th insurrection breathing down our necks without a mask on, I thought we’d kick off this year just as we started the last: talking about whether or not the Alien and Sedition Acts apply to the QAnon Shaman.¹

Today, we’re going to break down what we’ve learned about the attack in the twelve months since it happened, what the January 6th Committee is up to, and what the potential consequences are for the attack’s participants (by this, I do mean Trump and not one of the 700 people who have already been arrested for partaking in the event).²

Public Citizen @Public_Citizen

For reference, there were 14,000+ arrests at the George Floyd protests.

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TL;DR: What We’ve Learned About January 6th is More Fucked Up Than We Originally Thought, Which Is Actually Very On Brand

As we may remember from our inability to escape it all as it unfolded, former President Trump began claiming victory in the 2020 Election literally hours after the polls closed because the man heading the American government didn’t know how American elections worked and how just because the winner is projected hours after polls close doesn’t mean a winner is truly decided, especially in a race as close as this one was.

Besides that, he then went on a campaign defending his wrong opinion, as men are wont to do. But the secret sauce that led to the insurrection was the bizarre reverse-projecting tactic he has in which he conflates himself with his followers so they react as his proxy. And also classic fear-mongering.

Since the attack, a Washington Post investigation uncovered the following:

Source: Washington Post.

Like many women, the FBI ignored a number of red flags: sprinkled into the crowd breaching the Capitol were not Antifa false-flag operatives, but dozens of people on a terrorist watch list for prior white supremacist behavior. As the Post states, these individuals’ “past conduct so alarmed investigators that their names had been previously entered into the national Terrorist Screening Database, or TSDB, a massive set of names flagged as potential security risks.”

Source: Washington Post.

Kind of a yikes. Almost as bad (depending on which side you supported on 1/6) was how close the rioters came to finding Senator Mitt Romney (R-UT) and former Vice President Mike Pence in video coverage shown during Trump’s second impeachment hearing:

Further, it is now alleged that Representatives Paul Gosar (R–AZ), Andy Biggs (R–AZ), and Mo Brooks (R–AL) all had active roles in planning the attack which is certainly one way to get out of work. In addition, there is evidence that a meeting was held on January 5th featuring the Dream Team —Donald Trump Jr., Eric Trump, Michael Flynn, Corey Lewandowski, Kimberly Guilfoyle, Tommy Tuberville, Michael J. Lindell, Peter Navarro, and Rudy Giuliani— to discuss “illegal votes.”³

But what does any of this mean???

I’ve hit the demoralizing point in researching this when I want to throw my hands up, ask, “What does anything mean?”, and then fade to nothing.

Essentially, there was a concerted effort conducted by Trump, members of his administration, and his supporters within Congress to light the match on a volatile voting base that they have been amping up for five years. The investigations into January 6th have revealed that the expectation for this mob was violence against the American government on behalf of the guy from The Apprentice.

Does that not sound insane to anyone else???????

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United States House Select Committee of Besties ❤️

So an angry troupe of white supremacists, QAnon supporters, NBC reality TV enthusiasts, and people that liked learning about World War II a little too much in school breached the Capitol with the intention of interfering with constitutional government proceedings— now what? If you’re Congress, you launch a bureaucratic committee, of course!!

I do like the ambition of the January 6th Committee— it’s giving “we saw Avengers back in 2012 and really liked their vibe.” But from what they’ve done so far, their Endgame (see what I did there?) is far from clear. So far, the goal seems to be courting public opinion by holding hearings, conducting interviews, and subpoenaing those closest to Trump.

However, the ghost of Roy Cohn is with us all in these trying times as Trump’s closest allies have learned how to skirt around their subpoenas (sidebar for what a subpoena is).⁴ Former Chief of Staff Mark Meadows and ghoul haunting the Trump administration Steve Bannon “have been held in criminal contempt of Congress for refusing to testify; Bannon was indicted by a federal grand jury.” (x) The Meadows/Bannon Conundrum reminds me of that TikTok sound:

If God sends me to Hell, I simply won’t go. What’s He going to do—send me to Hell? I’m already not going.

Except instead, it’s:

If Congress sends me to Jail, I simply won’t go. What’re They going to do—send me to Jail? I’m already not going.

Additionally, there are so many articles out now claiming that some man Keith is a key witness who has claimed that Trump ignored pleas to intervene once the mob breached the Capitol from his kids, a slew of Fox News hosts, and his employees. I could have told you Trump was ignoring pleas to intervene once the mob breached the Capitol!!!! (I also could have probably told you Ivanka was one of the people who said something, and I 100% could have told you it was intended less as like a request so that people didn’t get hurt and the democracy stayed intact and more like a whole “this feels like the thing I should do to keep getting invited to Karlie Kloss’s parties.”)

All of the interviews revealing stuff I literally just imagined in a fever dream that turned out to be true and the subpoenas being left on read are meant to help prove the following:

Source: Washington Post.

But the question remains: what is proving that actually going to change?

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It’s Time For Everybody’s Favorite Game: “Will Trump Be Indicted???”

Technically, he was already found guilty of inciting an insurrection by the House of Representatives and was then acquitted of that crime by the Senate.

Impeachment is like the Elizabeth Holmes trial, something that would not have crushed my spirit to talk about: first, you go into court and your lawyers argue that you did not defraud Betsy DeVos’ family and then the jury says while you’re not guilty of defrauding patients you said you would help, you are guilty of defrauding Betsy DeVos’ family. The second phase of your trial is to determine how many years out of 20 you will spend in federal prison.

Trump’s federal prison would have been being removed from office and being barred from ever running for any other office again. The Senate acquitting Trump after he was found guilty for starting the insurrection would be if Elizabeth Holmes got community service when her max sentence was, again, 20 years in federal prison.

Earlier today, Jennifer Rubin wrote an op-ed in the Washington Post arguing what I had stated earlier (brag), that

the Jan. 6 House select committee appears to be assembling a powerful case that, as president, Donald Trump conducted a months-long effort to overturn the 2020 election results and, ultimately, instigated an assault on the U.S. Capitol to try to block the electoral vote count. Both the Democratic chairman and the Republican vice chair have indicated this could constitute criminal activity.

She writes that while it is up to the Department of Justice to file criminal charges against a former president, a resounding “Yes!” from the January 6th Committee to the question, “Is Trump guilty of sedition?” is incredibly important.

And I get that.

I remember how it felt when the Mueller Report came out and it just said, “We’re confident Trump obstructed justice 10 times, but we’re going to let Bill Barr’s DOJ just do its own thing.” It felt, first, boring. Second, like we were letting Trump & Co. off with a slap on the wrist. An affirmative, “Arrest this man!!!!” from Liz Cheney would arguably feel more empowering than that.

But Trump has been guilty of crimes before and he’ll be guilty of crimes again. As horrifying as it was to watch the Capitol under siege last year, we’ve seen him commit crimes in plain sight before without punishment. We’re literally watching his besties do it now! (I am, once again, referring to the Classic Mark-Steve Messaround.)

Instead, his followers are taking the fall for him as proxies do. Some are blaming Trump on the way down but we’ve seen that happen before with Michael Cohen, and to what end— more investigations into what we already know happened? A sick new podcast from the King of Long Island?

Maybe I’m being too pessimistic but I don’t know how not to be after researching this topic, okay? It’s weird to have witnessed a crime, be told that the primary perpetrator was guilty of orchestrating this crime, watch more behind-the-scenes footage of the crime taking place, be then told that the guilty perpetrator is getting off with a warning, then have another group talk about the crime more as if it still needs to be proven while that group simultaneously figures out what parts of the crime they can and can’t investigate in real-time.

It’s weird. Politics are weird. Our government is really fucking weird.

To sum it all up: on the anniversary of January 6th, we know more about what happened that day and less about what’s going to happen next. The only thing that is certain is that Elizabeth Holmes is a girlboss, and they really hate to see a girlboss winning.

Cardi B @iamcardib

Sometimes is ok to wake up and choose violence. At least once a month.

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I’d like to thank Donald Trump for constantly giving me more things to talk about here on E4P and you all for reading even when I don’t have a fun guest!!! I promise I will have so many amazing and brilliant people joining me again this year. Until then, you’re stuck with just me:

I have been dying to use this!!!!

1. Who is interestingly listed on Google as an “American activist.”  A bold choice, to be sure.

2. Did they actually think they were going to be the ones to topple the American government? I honestly don’t know, although I would assume so because people usually commit crimes with the intention of being successful.

3. Roger Stone was not at the meeting but did help fundraise to gather the girlies at the Capitol. Have to give my man his flowers while I can.

4. It’s a formal summons for a witness to attend court and provide testimony.